| good bye y'all |
[06 Feb 2005|11:30am] |
I can only understand the world vis-à-vis what I have learned in the last 1.5 years. I want to go back to New Mexico, I want the quietness and the tranquility that does my soul so much good. I want a place of my own with vast bookshelves where I can keep my books and house my new acquisitions. I want hardwood floors so that I can walk barefoot - I always get a kick out of that. I want a small place but it must have a lot of windows!! I want lots and lots of sunlight!! I love natural light.
I want a car of my own, I want to drive out and pull over in the middle of nowhere. I want to breathe in the air and then continue driving. I want that sort of freedom that nothing else can afford.
I want to have a place of my own, as I have described. I want to be totally cool and I want my friends from around the country to come here when they need to get away from life. I want to be there for them. I want to regale them with whimsical conversations of philosophy and theology. We can sit on the hammock in the backyard and talk until it becomes late and chilly outside.
I want to write long tracts on philosophical matters. I want to at least leave one treatise behind expounding something trivial and insignificant. I want to be the master of my own life and when I decide to end it, I wish no one to mind or care. I want them to be happy for me. I want all this and much more.
I don't want the cosmopolitan life I thought I did a long time ago. I don't crave to be a citizen of the world. I just crave to be me once more. I am tired of making those long trips to places. I want to think that travelling more than an hour is excessive! No one is worth my travelling more than an hour!
I want to have a cat or a dog, maybe both. And I want a lot of orchids! I want flowers blooming.
Simplicity is my end. I want this and much more. I want to go jogging along the miserable river, that inexistent river. I want to feel the burn, the pain that accompanies it all. I want to bend over, grabbing tightly my abdomen and coughing. My flesh aching, recoiling from my bones. I want to have my lungs ache from every breath and I want to be at the verge of collapse.
I want to rest too; a long sleep would do me good.
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| The best trip is the one that is never taken or never ends |
[04 Oct 2004|11:20pm] |
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St. John's was an interesting adventure, an essential part of my life (I dread to use the word essential but that is the only way that I am able to justify the 1,5 years and 60.000 USA invested in it). I must leave before the sweetness that still lingers on my lips fades. So I have to apply to AU, but I have a feeling that they will not have financial aid for me, so if I am admitted (one wonders) I will most probably have to defer it for a semester. I only hope that Shane is able to put up with me. I feel the polarity of Dido vis-à-vis Æneas, I can only sway to and fro; I feel the insanity of the characters of the Brothers Karamazov who dabble with life and death. Well, off to sleep for I am feeling nothing in particular.
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| internet prayer?¿ |
[15 Jun 2002|08:41pm] |
Omnípotens aetérne Deus,
qui secúndum imáginem Tuam nos plasmásti
et omnia bona, vera, pulchra,
praesértim in divína persóna Unigéniti Fílii Tui
Dómini nostri Iesu Chrísti,
quaérere iussísti, praesta quaésumus ut,
per intercessiónem Sancti Isidóri, Epíscopi et Doctóris,
in peregrinatiónibus per interrete**,
et manus oculósque ad quae Tibi sunt plácita intendámus
et omnes quos convenímus cum caritáte ac patiéntia accipiámus.
Per Christum Dóminum nostrum. Amen.
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| what others say about me |
[12 May 2002|11:33am] |
******: I'm gonna make you stop by after you finish school on the 17th.
digitalBoXorg: all right
******: because i missssssyoouuuuuu
digitalBoXorg: you miss me?
******: yes, duh.
digitalBoXorg: why do you miss me?
******: because you're small and cute and charming.
digitalBoXorg: oh my god
******: in that quiet, shy, libertarian kind of way.
digitalBoXorg: hahahahahaha
******: :P
******: i almost called you a republican :/
digitalBoXorg: whY?
digitalBoXorg: hahaha
******: i dunno.
******: hey i got my ear pierced.
digitalBoXorg: well i'm sure i'm not a republican
digitalBoXorg: oh?
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| Young Boy Loses Life Senselessly |
[11 Apr 2002|07:17am] |
A young boy by the name of John Welsh, age nine, died around sundown in a bizarre accident that can be at best described as freakish. The young boy, whose family resides in one of the upper valleys of the state [Vermont], had been given the chore of sawing pieces of firewood suitable to be used in the familys kitchen stove, which was to serve for cooking and heating purposes as well.
The boy was working diligently outside, his older sister standing a few feet off into the distance, surveying him as well as the surroundings from their houses porch. Suddenly, recounts the sister who was the first one to come to the assistance of the child, I heard this pitiable cry coming from my brothers direction. I immediately suspected something was wrong and I ran towards him only to discover what had happened. The girl commenced to scream upon realizing what had occurred and ran into the house to find her parents, who in turn upon realizing the situation called the local doctor to the scene.
What had been a chore, turned into a pointless and deadly accident; in the process of sawing the wood, a task somewhat too demanding of this young boy, the child accidentally sawed his left arm. According to the sister, the boy miserably exclaimed Dont let him cut my hand off The doctor, when he comes. Dont let him, sister! upon having made a realization of what had occurred to him, but unfortunately there was nothing that could prevent that being the eventual result.
The doctor soon after arriving at the familys residence, too late to do much to save the boy, placed him under an anesthetic, ether, leaving the boy in a state of sleep; sadly the boy was not to awaken from this state. He perished a few minutes after being anesthetized.
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amities's journal